Help I Sexted My Boss
Pranks, Priests and Food Swings
The boys are still reeling from the team’s prank, and are already plotting their revenge. William has the latest scoop on the Vatican’s hot priests calendar, we check in with the G who recorded a Spice Girls classic for their birthday, and Jordan’s latest “food swings” bring out his snobbiest opinions yet.
4 Apr 2025 - 26 min 42 s
Help I’m Going To Be A Star
There’s a big announcement, but only one of the boys is in the spotlight - cue the tension. Jordan’s boxers make an unexpected appearance during a house viewing, while William is once again accused of being passive aggressive (shock). Plus, the boys try to help a G whose piercings have wandered to some rather unexpected places.
1 Apr 2025 - 40 min 12 s
Stretch Limos, Spice Girls and Split Sandwiches
William paints a complete picture of his 7th birthday party complete with limos, bowl cuts, and, of course, proper etiquette - quite different from Jordan and our G ’s experiences. The boys gain some saucy insider knowledge on Vatican gift shops and one listener honours Campman with a little help from her furry friends.
28 Mar 2025 - 20 min 46 s
Help He’s A Suitcase Shagger
There’s been a major incident in the studio… William has a stain on his shirt. Trying to distract from the drama, Jordan tells us all about rubbing shoulders with one of the greatest actors ever. Plus, the boys try to help a G who’s witnessed a shocking crime against suitcases.
25 Mar 2025 - 41 min 28 s
Sloshed Singing, Gay Goats and A Relationship Review
Sexted has officially reached the ripe old age of seven! The podcast has aged like a fine wine, but the boys? Less so. With Dubonnet firmly in the mix, they take on a Relationship MOT to test their friendship, and let’s just say… a few icks are brought to light. On a slightly sweeter note, Elis and Janet send their birthday wishes, and there’s a new William and Jordan grazing about.
21 Mar 2025 - 25 min 05 s
Help We're Getting Smashed
It’s birthday week! The boys reminisce on the last seven years and celebrate with a drink… or five. As the alcohol kicks in, they discuss their recent trip to the theatre to see Blood Brothers, William’s appearance on an unfiltered Aussie radio show, and attempt to help a G with a cock-blocking Nerf gun situation… which, in their state, is no easy feat.
18 Mar 2025 - 52 min 25 s
Security Scuffles, Sistine Shops and Spanish Cock Or Ball
The boys take Cock or Ball international with a little help from a Spanish G William is gearing up to school us all on the Sistine Chapel (not the Sixteenth), while Jordan seems more interested in the Vatican’s gift shops. And all this talk of ancient monuments reminds Jordan of the time he found himself on the wrong side of a security guard.
14 Mar 2025 - 23 min 32 s
Help It Squirted In My Eye
William is fresh off a flight and running on no sleep, while Jordan has been busy slaying as Dorothy with a nasty case of pink eye after an unexpected foreign substance found its way into his eye. Despite it all, they’re here to tackle dilemmas about the perils of holding in a fart and an intimate conversation being broadcast in an unexpected way.
11 Mar 2025 - 35 min 27 s
Mikey’s Mandate, Operatic Offerings and The Dorothy Dupe
There’s an official statement from Mikey correcting the misinformation spread by the boys in Tuesday’s episode. Jordan’s been duped into a World Book Day costume at his “other job”, and William has a wonderful gift from a G who is satisfying his appetite for more Cha Cha Cha’s.
7 Mar 2025 - 24 min 24 s
Help I’m Lady Garden
Fresh from their road trip to Devon, the boys reflect on the weekend with mixed reviews. One thing they can all agree on, though, is Sarah Hanson’s next-level hospitality (naturally, Daaahlings!). Meanwhile, there’s debate over the proper etiquette for addressing an unfortunately named baroness, and Jordan shares some explicit audio from his physio session, let’s just say, he’s never gone deeper.
4 Mar 2025 - 43 min 52 s